Birthday cake candles are entirely ****ing Rubbish

HeHateMe

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I will never understand this concept where one would voluntarily allow melting of candle wax into a cake you are sharing with your friends and family only to have the person celebrating blow their saliva all over the cake as a celebratory act. Essentially you are immediately turning a perfectly nice dessert into trash before anyone even gets the opportunity to enjoy its taste and texture, because we just all of a sudden decided to be unsanitary, unintelligent oafs who if were working professionally in the foodservice industry, would be incarcerated for such an act or at a minimum fined.
Birthday Cake candles are ****ing the epitome of idiocy and revolting.
In summation, in the event you crave debris and additionally, saliva and mucus in your Cake, Birthday candles were invented specifically for you.
 
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Next people will get mad at others breathing in the same room. Stop to think about that one for a bit.

Now my issue is how many people who half ass it. Candles with the number on them instead of individual candles. Smash cakes for babies, Icing that comes in a sheet like putting saran wrap on a cake.
 
number51

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Solution:

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I have the plans drawn up if you want to diy:

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Hawkeye OG

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Who over the age of 15 eats cake? it's disgusting
 
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I guess I just never thought of it that way. This is some existential levels of dorkchop.
 
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number51

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HawkBear said:
Who over the age of 15 eats cake? it's disgusting
Click to expand...

Look it's Putin! Cake hating commy! FU Putin!!!

German Chocolate cake is manna, you left wing fascist alt-right neocon libtard!

#dumfukcukdankdickfukmewetoolowbangdingow!

Also Black Forrest cake from Sauer's Bakery in Carol Stream, don't forget they make a fine eclair, tell them 51 sent ya!
o.jpg
 
DC

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VashalasX said:
I will never understand this concept where one would voluntarily allow melting of candle wax into a cake you are sharing with your friends and family only to have the person celebrating blow their saliva all over the cake as a celebratory act. Essentially you are immediately turning a perfectly nice dessert into trash before anyone even gets the opportunity to enjoy its taste and texture, because we just all of a sudden decided to be unsanitary, unintelligent oafs who if were working professionally in the foodservice industry, would be incarcerated for such an act or at a minimum fined.
Birthday Cake candles are ****ing the epitome of idiocy and revolting.
In summation, in the event you crave debris and additionally, saliva and mucus in your Cake, Birthday candles were invented specifically for you.
Click to expand...

Omelet has been reborn.
 
Hbkrusso

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VashalasX said:
I will never understand this concept where one would voluntarily allow melting of candle wax into a cake you are sharing with your friends and family only to have the person celebrating blow their saliva all over the cake as a celebratory act. Essentially you are immediately turning a perfectly nice dessert into trash before anyone even gets the opportunity to enjoy its taste and texture, because we just all of a sudden decided to be unsanitary, unintelligent oafs who if were working professionally in the foodservice industry, would be incarcerated for such an act or at a minimum fined.
Birthday Cake candles are ****ing the epitome of idiocy and revolting.
In summation, in the event you crave debris and additionally, saliva and mucus in your Cake, Birthday candles were invented specifically for you.
Click to expand...

gotta admit never thought about it this way. luckily for me ive never actually eaten cake I'm allergict to sugar. I spend most of my time making sure whatever I'm about to eat doesn't kill me
 
Hawkeye OG

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number51 said:
Look it's Putin! Cake hating commy! FU Putin!!!

German Chocolate cake is manna, you left wing fascist alt-right neocon libtard!

#dumfukcukdankdickfukmewetoolowbangdingow!

Also Black Forrest cake from Sauer's Bakery in Carol Stream, don't forget they make a fine eclair, tell them 51 sent ya!
o.jpg
Click to expand...

Most cakes are to rich for me. Not a big sugar lover. I do enjoy an occasional jello cake.
 
Hbkrusso

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never thought id say this but thank god for my sugar allergy
 
number51

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Hbkrusso said:
gotta admit never thought about it this way. luckily for me ive never actually eaten cake I'm allergict to sugar. I spend most of my time making sure whatever I'm about to eat doesn't kill me
Click to expand...

But BBQ?

VashalasX said:
Not everything has to be a joke.
Click to expand...

It's the bar, so yes, everything does have to be a joke.

Spunky Porkstacker said:
He didn't call everyone dicklickers though.
Click to expand...

That will not be happening, our young friend does not appreciate foul fucking language.
Shit, I made a joke.
Ah **** I swore.

This fucking kid is going to hate me.
 
Monster

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I've never put them on cakes.
I drip the wax on my sack when Batin!
 
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xer0h0ur

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I do too while bathing :smug2:
 
number51

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Well this took a nasty turn. Back on track.

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