New Limerick Thread

[bri]

Some of you expressed some interest in having one on these. I encourage everyone to contribute. Just be nice and respectful and have fun. Here are a few to start you out.





A young lady was so in denial

That she escaped reality for awhile

She came to the conclusion

It was all and illusion

And is no longer able to smile





Patrick Sharp is definitely a cutie

In fact, Chicago Magazine declared him a beauty

On the ice when he's chokin'

That boy is still smokin'

Cause lookin' good is his primary duty.





Patrick Kane is said to be cocky

But man that boy can play hockey

For decades fans were waitin’

So he slipped one in past Leighton

And brought the Stanley Cup home to Rocky



“Hawks Win” screamed the announcer named Foley

As the puck flew right past the goalie

Only seconds remained

Two more points now gained

Thanks to the breakaway run from Bollie.





A hockey announcer called Eddie

Sang the praises of a player named Leddy

He may be a rookie

But he’s a pretty smart cookie

And showed his teammates he’s able and ready





There is a giant of a Blackhawk named Scott

The most talented of players, he is not

His teammates tell

He gives off quite a smell

Like something is starting to rot



(But he has kind eyes and a great smile)





How many Polish people does it take

To put on a bracelet for Heaven’s sake

Apparently it takes three

And that includes me

It’s a wonder the thing didn’t break.





There once was a hockey player who lost seven teeth

Three were on the top and four underneath

A legend was made

And homage was paid

To the Blackhawk warrior Duncan Keith





Seabrook plays hockey with fire and sass

Just ask an opponent he’s knocked on his ass

He plays hard, but clean

Never spiteful or mean

Always the epitome of integrity and class

 

[sth]

Very good Bri. These are all great. I'm sure the rest of the board will have some too. But yours are great.

 

[sth]

With no opportunity proffered

He toiled in Rockford

Looking for his chance

To make the big dance

Now no one can beat Corey Crawford

 

[TSD]

TCD was on a mission in vancouver.

for a hooker that sucks like a hoover.

just when he was in doubt.

he found jakobeast toiling about.



Ymono was exclaimed to TCD he is jealous.

he screamed and we said why dont you tell us!

he said with authority step off nasty nate thats my *****!

and his cockblock of TCD went off without a hitch.



never one to give up!

TCD called RK to see if he could bang his pup. (yes dog not children)

RK said you're sick!

TCD simply lamented what to do with my hard dick!



When all hope was lost.

Supraman showed up and said his salad needed to be tossed!

TCD Sported a grin.

licked his chops and dug in!







I could have just kept going, but im too lazy to incorporate everyone into my title "TCD gets his rocks off in vancouver".

 

[jakobeast]

When his lady left for another he

Anger flowed out directed towards she

Tranny Sperm Dumpster

The Ballsack Decruster

The "man" they cal TSD

 

[TSD]

When his lady left for another he

Anger flowed out directed towards she

Tranny Sperm Dumpster

The Ballsack Decruster

The "man" they cal TSD

I'd call you a ******, but I got laid friday, I am absolutely glowing, almost as much as Brodie in mallrats. NOBODY can ruin my mood.

 

[bubbleheadchief]

Those are pretty good Bri.....had to laugh at the Polack one especially.

 

[jakobeast]

I'd call you a ******, but I got laid friday, I am absolutely glowing, almost as much as Brodie in mallrats. NOBODY can ruin my mood.

I had heard. I saw your post on the main page.



What was his name?

 

[TSD]

I had heard. I saw your post on the main page.



What was his name?

Just so you know I made the totally smooth(un) move of requesting her friendship on facebook asking if she wanted to hang out again. Now on face value when not drunk its like a wtf were you thinking move, but her response appeared enthusiastic.

 

[PatrickSharpRules]

Just so you know I made the totally smooth(un) move of requesting her friendship on facebook asking if she wanted to hang out again. Now on face value when not drunk its like a wtf were you thinking move, but her response appeared enthusiastic.

Good for you

I just took a good poo

Thats a pretty big feat......

But

 

[TSD]

Good for you

I just took a good poo

Thats a pretty big feat......

But

dude she isnt 10. in fact she is 3 months older than me so you should be sending that to her.

 

[jakobeast]

Just so you know I made the totally smooth(un) move of requesting her friendship on facebook asking if she wanted to hang out again. Now on face value when not drunk its like a wtf were you thinking move, but her response appeared enthusiastic.

Appeared enthusiastic? Of course she did. At least this way she can keep tabs on where you are and can make up good excuses as to why she doesn't want to meet up with you.

 

[PatrickSharpRules]

dude she isnt 10. in fact she is 3 months older than me so you should be sending that to her.

Really? Not a chuckle out of Chris Hansen dressed as a Jedi? If thats not comedy then I don't know where to turn. Thats defensive enough to make me think that she might be 10.



Remember, bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks. <Words to live by.

 

[TSD]

Really? Not a chuckle out of Chris Hansen dressed as a Jedi? If thats not comedy then I don't know where to turn. Thats defensive enough to make me think that she might be 10.



Remember, bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks. <Words to live by.

lol.

 

[MassHavoc]

Just so you know I made the totally smooth(un) move of requesting her friendship on facebook asking if she wanted to hang out again. Now on face value when not drunk its like a wtf were you thinking move, but her response appeared enthusiastic.

So wait... you made a comment on facebook about getting laid... then invited that person to be a friend so she could see what you posted? Genius.

 

[LordKOTL]

dude she isnt 10. in fact she is 3 months older than me so you should be sending that to her.

So TSD finally got laid

And pussy was something he craved

She was older than he:

Robbing the cradle was she?

Or was TSD robbing the grave?

 

[TSD]

So TSD finally got laid

And pussy was something he craved

She was older than he:

Robbing the cradle was she?

Or was TSD robbing the grave?

hey i resemble that statement.

 

[TSD]

So wait... you made a comment on facebook about getting laid... then invited that person to be a friend so she could see what you posted? Genius.

lol no i didnt make a comment on facebook about it. I didnt like post on face book "I got laid! Friend request time!"



I just thought it may have been creepy for me to facebook friend someone with whom for all intents and purposes you participated in what would normally be a one shot deal.



I havent heard back from her again yet, but she didnt unfriend me. She seemed really happy i friended her.



I feel like a dumbass stalking facebook all the time awaiting her reply to going out again. (in the friend request I asked her, but she said the message disappeared right away and to tell her what I said)



The exact words were "facebook is stupid and I think you sent a message and it disappeared right away when I accepted the friend request, let me know, I had fun the other night."



and yes when I got home the next morning I totally played this like 5 times in a row..

[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQlIhraqL7o[/media]