That time you almost died

[Penny Traitor]

With coronavirus and zombies currently all the buzz here in The Bar, I had a morbid idea for a thread. Just as the title says...share a story about a time you almost literally died. To start:

I stopped into liquor store because I was out of cigarettes and it was within eyeshot. I walk up to the counter and have the following exchange:

"Marlboro Reds please"

"I don't have Marlboros. Only Camels."

"Really?"

"Sorry."

"Okay Camel Filters."

I pay and leave. I get maybe fifty feet up the street and I hear skidding tires as this four door sedan jumps the sidewalk not far in front of me crushing a no parking sign and trash can before violently slamming into the brick corner of an apartment building while I just froze. It would later dawn on me that if that liquor store carried Marlboro Reds, that would have shortened the entire trip inside just enough to put me right in the path of that wreck.

From that day till the day I quit, I only bought Camels.

 

[Omeletpants]

I was driving with my daughter over a bridge over an expressway. Suddenly some guy drives up grassy part and flies past us in a perpendicular manner. We just missed T-boning us and I thought we were going to die

When I was 17 years old and new driver living in Chicago, I was making a left hand turn. Big truck coming opposite direction and thought was going to make a left hand turn in front of me. I decided to go then stopped suddenly. He just kept barrelling through with his left turn signal on. If I had proceeded I would have been dead and blamed as a dumb kid not knowing how to drive. It was a compelling moment and I hathought of it often over the last 47 years

 

[Penny Traitor]

When I was 17 years old and new driver living in Chicago

I was not driving, but same circumstance and age. The driver took that hairpin turn on Lake Shore Drive near The Drake way too fast and I saw that concrete dividing wall just inches from the door I was seated.

Got a feeling a lot of these may involve vehicles.

 

[Omeletpants]

I was not driving, but same circumstance and age. The driver took that hairpin turn on Lake Shore Drive near The Drake way too fast and I saw that concrete dividing wall just inches from the door I was seated.

Got a feeling a lot of these may involve vehicles.

There are a few moments in life that you cant forget and I didnt even mention when i cut off 2 finger tips

 

[Ares]

I once fought a Walrus...

They are too big, you shouldn't fight them.

 

[Chief Walking Stick]

I was driving with my daughter over a bridge over an expressway. Suddenly some guy drives up grassy part and flies past us in a perpendicular manner. We just missed T-boning us and I thought we were going to die

When I was 17 years old and new driver living in Chicago, I was making a left hand turn. Big truck coming opposite direction and thought was going to make a left hand turn in front of me. I decided to go then stopped suddenly. He just kept barrelling through with his left turn signal on. If I had proceeded I would have been dead and blamed as a dumb kid not knowing how to drive. It was a compelling moment and I hathought of it often over the last 47 years

Too bad neither of those scenarios played out differently.

 

[Omeletpants]

Too bad neither of those scenarios played out differently.

Even though I have you on ignore, I sense that you said something incredibly insensitive and stupid

 

[Hawkeye OG]

Idk if I was close to death or not, but when I was in 4th/5th grade, I was riding my bike home from school and was hit by a car. Classic case of crossing the street without looking. I don't really remember much other than the person who hit me put me in their car and drove me and my beat up bike home. My mom let me sleep off my concussion for the next 1.5 days lmao. The wreck happened on a Friday afternoon and I didn't wake up until Sunday morning. I was very confused at how long I slept. I didn't have any broken bones or anything, just a massive scrape on my head and arms so my parents didn't take me to the hospital. I don't think you are suppose to sleep after a concussion, but apparently we didn't know that in the late 90s.

Nowadays, if a kid is at a sleepever, the helicopter mom texts their kid every 20 minutes to make sure they are ok lol.

 

[airtime143]

With coronavirus and zombies currently all the buzz here in The Bar, I had a morbid idea for a thread. Just as the title says...share a story about a time you almost literally died. To start:

I stopped into liquor store because I was out of cigarettes and it was within eyeshot. I walk up to the counter and have the following exchange:

"Marlboro Reds please"

"I don't have Marlboros. Only Camels."

"Really?"

"Sorry."

"Okay Camel Filters."

I pay and leave. I get maybe fifty feet up the street and I hear skidding tires as this four door sedan jumps the sidewalk not far in front of me crushing a no parking sign and trash can before violently slamming into the brick corner of an apartment building while I just froze. It would later dawn on me that if that liquor store carried Marlboro Reds, that would have shortened the entire trip inside just enough to put me right in the path of that wreck.

From that day till the day I quit, I only bought Camels.

If only it was Lucky Strikes.

 

[airtime143]

Probably would not have been fatal, but I almost got both my feet turned to hamburger once.

At a friend of mines lake, and they wanted me to teach their kid how to wakeboard.
Their boat was an I/O, which results in the prop being right at the back of the boat.
I pop off the swim deck in to the water, and my friend bumped the throttle in to reverse with his elbow.
He caught it very quickly and dropped it to neutral- had he not it would have been bad.

The prop sucked the board down and chewed through half the width of the board- the ragged hole was 3/4s of an inch from my left foot and one inch from my right.
The board looked like a shark took a chomp out of it.

 

[Burque]

Late 90's Early 2000's was driving my little Z car to Arizona to see a friend at ASU and hang out/party for the weekend. Had just gotten off an overnight work shift and bailed west. Was groggy but doing fine for quite awhile hitting myself with doses of mountain dew etc. At some point I dozed off, was in the right lane doing 80 or so, woke up going off the road into the center when I hit the rumble strips, hit the gravel, bounced back up onto the freeway, steered/slid to the right lane and then off the road. Parked the car (Now totally awake and freaked TF out) and got out. I must've been out for at least several seconds and swerving because there was a rather large line of cars that flew by right after I got off the right side of the road. I walked around the car a few times and calmed down a bit and then the adrenaline wore off and I crashed hard, right there where I was parked for like two hours until the hot desert sun woke me up all sweaty but refreshed, made the rest of the trip completely unmemorable.

 

[Penny Traitor]

If only it was Lucky Strikes

If only young & dumb Vu took that as a sign to quit smoking altogether instead of switching brands and continuing to slowly kill himself anyhow.

c'est la vie!

 

[Les Grossman]

I've had a couple of close calls riding motorcycles in my younger days where subconsciousness reaction (or maybe non-action) saved my ass leaving my heart racing for the rest of the day.

But more recently I recall an incident where I had one of those "oh ****", time slows down type moments when I was simply walking my dog to the park and I crossed the neighborhood street by my house while texting on my phone and I suddenly heard a truck not slowing down to make his turn and as I looked up he skidded to a stop in mid turn about 3 feet from me. the sun was just going down and I think the only reason he saw me was because my dog had a light on his collar... The street visibility is clear to see someone crossing the street, the guy must have just zoned out... No more phone while walking for me.

The Al Pacino quote from the movie Heat forever lives in my mind now "YOU GET KILT WALKING YOUR DOGGY!"

 

[Chief Walking Stick]

Even though I have you on ignore, I sense that you said something incredibly insensitive and stupid

Would be insensitve if you weren't subhuman.

 

[PrideisBears]

So many times. Been hit by a semi, twice. My life vest burst when I was in deep water in PVR, stray bullet went through my rental car once in NY and of course deer hate me too

 

[ijustposthere]

My cousin and I almost got shot selling candy bars for school. At two in the afternoon. Never sold anything door-to-door again.

 

[ijustposthere]

So many times. Been hit by a semi, twice. My life vest burst when I was in deep water in PVR, stray bullet went through my rental car once in NY and of course deer hate me too

****. I almost got hit by a semi. Had I been running on time, it would've nailed me as it blew the stop sign. So, I never hurry if I'm running late after that one.

 

[PrideisBears]

****. I almost got hit by a semi. Had I been running on time, it would've nailed me as it blew the stop sign. So, I never hurry if I'm running late after that one.

Semi crashes ain't no joke. First time it was raining and he hydroplanes into the next lane, hit me and two other cars. Luckily nobody was seriously injured, unfortunately for him he worked for Walmart so you know all of us were getting paid.

Second one, he ran a red light and hit my passenger side. Totalled my car and broke my left hand. Still cautious around semis after that one

 

[1COBearsfan]

I was driving to work a few months ago and a truck somewhere in front of me kicked up a cantaloupe sized piece of asphalt that caved in the driver’s side of my windshield. When it happened I was just pissed about it but the more I thought about it I realized I was pretty lucky

 

[Sculpt]

I had some close calls...

One time I was driving down a two lane highway (two each way) at 55 mph, in the middle of winter in Chicagoland. One lane was cleared and blacktop. The otherside was white... I guess it was compressed snow/ice. Well... I was running late for class, and there was a semi in front of me going 'too slow'. So I decided to take the white road to pass the truck. What could go wrong?

I moved up alongside the semi, about to the back of the semi's cab. No problem. Then, the car started to fishtail. I always get a little fishtailing under control. Except this time. It started to fishtail wildly. I thought I was going under the semi... but after about 30 million years of what may have been 20 long seconds of trying to control the fishing tailing, I got it under control, slowed down, moved back into the left lane, and followed behind the semi on the 'black road'. And I was so, so, so freaking high. I guess my body released a flood of endorphins in anticipation of waiting for the jaws-of-death to release my crumpled body. Lesson learned. Need to make poor decisions to get heavy duty natrual high.