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By which of course I refer to a dude's instincts with women during their "time of the month".
Share your war stories.... discuss.
Share your war stories.... discuss.
Combat Instincts
- Thread starter Ares
- Start date
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I just hide in my room until it's over.
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This thread brought to you by one of our female co-workers asking for Advil.... not for a headache....
And me all like
And clone all like
And me all like
And clone all like
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Either no one wants to tell their hilarious stories.... or you are all sucking up to MrsG
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No stories but I will say Pamprin works miracles on a hangover.
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You disappoint me
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My favorite teams
Works great for tension headaches too... but you really shouldn't be taking acetaminophen with alcohol in your system.
Not good for da liver.
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My favorite teams
If ***** get cranky with me I just give her 1" of hell
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When was I was 15, I was hammered messing around with this chick. Started petting the cooch and played around and in it for a minute. I was starting to get my machine gun momentum working then she kind of stopped it. Well, I start going for it again and she tells me, "Wait, I need to take out my tampon". I look down and I got some of da blood on me. I was so hammered and horny that I didn't even notice the ****** in there. Ever since then, my friends call me "Bloody Fingers Silences". Well, it was "Bloody Fingers (enter my last name)" but I am not giving you freaks my last name. And by the way, I would do it again. I miss that girl.
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You should be used to it by now.
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Yeah, somehow I don't think this is the kind of story Ares was looking for. He was asking about combat instincts, not conquest instincts.
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This is 'Merica
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How many people have you killed so far?
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Since we are derailing this thread so quickly let's hear everyone's story of how they earned their "red wings" Bet that is more interesting than hiding from the wife while she tries to rip your dick off every month for 5 days. Menopause is a fantastic thing. I got a good one from my days in Nam. But aint gonna tell it unless others join in.
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War Story: Dating a diagnosed bi-polar that decided to drink a half a bottle of vodka a day after starting her period. I still have a scar from the broken glass when she threw the bottle at me.
(she meant to throw it at a girl ten feet to my left, but...you know...vodka...girl arm...etc.)
Battle Tip: Whenever she is at her worst...give her chocolate (make that chocolate ice cream if she is complaining about the heat). It's fucking magic. Like she just snorted a few lines of Prozac. Saves me 9 times out of 10 (the one time it does not...I hide too).
(she meant to throw it at a girl ten feet to my left, but...you know...vodka...girl arm...etc.)
Battle Tip: Whenever she is at her worst...give her chocolate (make that chocolate ice cream if she is complaining about the heat). It's fucking magic. Like she just snorted a few lines of Prozac. Saves me 9 times out of 10 (the one time it does not...I hide too).
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Let's just say she has the accuracy of Cutler
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No one has actually earned their red wings......or even been in the military....gotcha
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ok **** it ill tell ya the story
I was partying pretty hard back in the day went way overboard with various drugs and alchohol woke up at my house no clue how I got there. realized I was fucking late for work just threw the clothes beside the bed on and rushed straight to work.
I pull up to the job and of course im getting shit from all the guys as soon as I get outta the car walk over and start getting my tools out and another bricklayer says dude wtf is all that shit in your beard
needless to say I was at the water barrel washing a shit ton of blood out of my beard and all the guys are like you sick ****.
still too this day cant say whether I ate a **** ton of bloody pussy or I went full werewolf and killed the neighbors livestock
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Beer, whisky - repeat.
Hooked up
Passed out
Woke up
Bloody hand prints/smears on the wall next to the bed
Red crust all over both our faces and naughty parts
She was mortified, I laughed it off
Showered
Left
Hooked up
Passed out
Woke up
Bloody hand prints/smears on the wall next to the bed
Red crust all over both our faces and naughty parts
She was mortified, I laughed it off
Showered
Left