DEA warns Utah lawmakers that legal pot could lead to stoned rabbit attacks

Tater

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http://blog.sfgate.com/smellthetrut...egal-pot-could-lead-to-stoned-rabbit-attacks/


Utah lawmakers are now considering legalizing medical marijuana in their state, which has the DEA very concerned about the impending threat of stoned bunny rabbits.
Sen. Mark Madsen recently introduced a bill that would allow patients to legally possess and use medical marijuana. While Madsen is looking out for his constituents, special agent Matt Fairbanks is convinced that legalization would only turn the state’s cutest mammals against them.
In a testimony presented to the Utah Senate Panel, Fairbanks shared his harrowing experiences with hares as part of the state’s “cannabis eradication” team.
“I deal in facts. I deal in science,” said Fairbanks, prefacing his argument for the preservation of drug-free wildlife.
Fairbanks said that at some illegal marijuana grow sites he saw ”rabbits that had cultivated a taste for the marijuana.”
“One of them refused to leave us, and we took all the marijuana around him, but his natural instincts to run were somehow gone,” said Fairbanks.
Despite Fairbanks’ concern over fearless, stoned rabbits uniting to take over the Great Salt Lake, the Senate committee approved the measure by a 3-2 vote.




stonedbunnies-306x229.jpg
 

Novak

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Is this a joke? Is this the same bich that put weed in the same class as meth and crack?
 

TCD

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It will keep the rabbits from fucking and over populating. Nobody likes to fuck when they are body stoned....oh wait.

Yah Utah is fucked. Dont plant carrots in your gardens. Those fuck happy munchies craving rabbits gunna run amuck. Just a matter of time until the rabbits form gangs and claim territories also. Arian brotherhood of rabbits gunna be running the spca cages soon also.
 

ruprecht

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This is what terrifies me.
 

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motherofgod.gif
 

xer0h0ur

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*Hits the blunt*

Wassssup Doc?
 

botfly10

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just to clarify, this one one idiot testifying. you can be sure dude has lost his job or been transferred to AK.
 

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I've never run across any violent stoners. I thought the quote of "their natural instincts to run were somehow gone" was pretty funny. I just pictured a baked rabbit just lying there not giving a fuck.
 

Jester

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Bunnies with dreadlocks would be pretty cute.
 

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