This needs to be discussed.

[the canadian dream]

It's a horrible sad story. It's big news here in Vancouver and around the internets now. I am sure everyone has seen the story. Another example of the brutality of bullying.



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ej7afkypUsc

 

[phranchk]

Internet bullying is sometimes worse than "traditional" bullying. It's so much harder to hide from. It's become a real big problem.

 

[Chief Walking Stick]

Is there any audio that's supposed to be playing?

 

[the canadian dream]

Internet bullying is sometimes worse than "traditional" bullying. It's so much harder to hide from. It's become a real big problem.

Agree, This poor girl took it from everywhere though..online and out in public. I know young teens can be really brutal and it's part of a very difficult time in some peoples lives esp when they are confused by sex and sexuality which seems to be the case here. I was lucky enough to never have any real bullying done to me when younger and felt like shit when any of my friends involved themselves in bullying others. Also lucky I was growing up in a community where bullying was noticed and people did something about it. And in my community and schools and more importantly my house we talked about sex and sexuality openly. but yah like you said back in my days it was a easier as things were out in the public much more as there was no internet, social media etc. Really complicates things for these young teens even more.



Young girls take it the worst it seems. This poor girl new her mistakes it sounded like and I don't know her parents or their history so I can't comment on it although it appears she was vocal about it with them as she was talking to doctors.. But if she was sitting a lone at schools and getting harassed to the degree she stated she was..some adult figure must have been aware of it and those who were doing it. Those doing the bullying need to be set examples of before things escalate to these levels.

 

[PatrickShart]

TCD, I am sorry for bullying you.

 

[the canadian dream]

Is there any audio that's supposed to be playing?

Not in the original video. I picked this one with the voice over at the beginning just so people know that the actual video is a month old but she took her life more recently. Was certainly a clear cry for help when she first put her tape out there. Im not sure what measures were taken when it was first out. Obviously she was struggling with it all for some time. What do you do when therapy and anti-depressants aren't working? She took steps it appears. Something else failed her.

 

[PatrickShart]

Where the hell are her parents? Why is she even going on FB after that guy was spreading porn? Parents need to raise the kid, not the internet/social media.

 

[the canadian dream]

TCD, I am sorry for bullying you.

That's okay. I can handle the stigma of being caught with a penis in my mouth now that I am a bit older. You should be the one ashamed anyways..I mean have you ever heard of a penis pump? You are lacking in girth my friend.

 

[PatrickShart]

Thats only because entering your ass is like throwing a hot dog in a tunnell

 

[the canadian dream]

Where the hell are her parents? Why is she even going on FB after that guy was spreading porn? Parents need to raise the kid, not the internet/social media.

I think most parents are too busy on social media themselves to really know what is going on with their kids. Esp the generation of parents right now who are raising teens and pre-teens. It's my generation for **** sakes and I know how lazy and self absorbed my generation is. One reason I refuse to have children is because of the lack of maturity I have and how distracted I am with things like social media etc. My generation has always been bad at balancing family, work, social obligations etc. Now I am certainly generalizing here but when I look at my friends who do have children and see how they act on social media it's fascinating. The measurements of maturity levels is pretty low and example setting is brutal. Including myself as I am about to prove.



Social media is a great thing but it has come with horrible side effects.

 

[the canadian dream]

Thats only because entering your ass is like throwing a hot dog in a tunnell

my anal stretch isn't the issue here good sir!!!

 

[PatrickShart]

I don't buy the whole "parents arent aware" of facebook at this point. You can't go ANYWHERE without it. It's not like the old days of AOL Chatrooms when you were pretending to be a chick talking to old dudes. EVERYONE either has - or knows about facebook these days, and this child had no business having access to it after the first fiasco with the child pornographer showing her pic out there

 

[PatrickShart]

my anal stretch isn't the issue here good sir!!!

It's not stretching if I can parallel park a buick in there.

 

[the canadian dream]

I don't buy the whole "parents arent aware" of facebook at this point. You can't go ANYWHERE without it. It's not like the old days of AOL Chatrooms when you were pretending to be a chick talking to old dudes. EVERYONE either has - or knows about facebook these days, and this child had no business having access to it after the first fiasco with the child pornographer showing her pic out there

Thats what I mean though. Even parents are too busy on facebook these days too much which takes away from their parenting rolls. Some care more about their own facebook updates and twitter status than they do about what their kids did in school. And I can't believe I am saying that because I usually give parents the benefit of the doubt. I really believe my generation of parenting is extremely lazy and passive. Distracted and too easily willing to let technology raise their children without restrictions. I agree with that. I sound like a cranky old man who wants to say "kids these days blah blah blah" but Im actually saying "my generation really sucks and kids are following that lead".

 

[jakobeast]

I don't want to sound heartless, but seriously, where were her fucking parents? i gathered from the notes that they were divorced. No excuse. they cared enough to get her on medication, thats great, but it stopped there? WTF? she drank bleach, and later O.D'ed on her meds, AND THAT DIDN'T RAISE A RED FUCKING FLAG?!?!?!?!?!?! I am sure her parents are destroyed.by this. Well, actually, no, I am not sure they are. While I don't know them and won't judge them, but seriously, wtf? i really hope they weren't wrapped up in their divorce or getting back at each other for petty shit.



Also, Amanda should have gone to the police as soon as the guy threatened her. I am pretty sure any pic of her would have been underage, and considered child porn, and the cops would have found that guy real quick. And the chick that beat her up? Yeah, press charges. Or at least have someone teach you how to hit.

 

[the canadian dream]

I don't want to sound heartless, but seriously, where were her fucking parents? i gathered from the notes that they were divorced. No excuse. they cared enough to get her on medication, thats great, but it stopped there? WTF? she drank bleach, and later O.D'ed on her meds, AND THAT DIDN'T RAISE A RED FUCKING FLAG?!?!?!?!?!?! I am sure her parents are destroyed.by this. Well, actually, no, I am not sure they are. While I don't know them and won't judge them, but seriously, wtf? i really hope they weren't wrapped up in their divorce or getting back at each other for petty shit.



Also, Amanda should have gone to the police as soon as the guy threatened her. I am pretty sure any pic of her would have been underage, and considered child porn, and the cops would have found that guy real quick. And the chick that beat her up? Yeah, press charges. Or at least have someone teach you how to hit.

I dont think its heartless to ask any of those questions Jako. I think they are the right questions to ask and have to be asked.



I have a feeling she was felt threatened to a point where going to the police etc just imposed more fear into her. That is usually the case. So yah an adult figure was def needed there to help her. Again we don't know all the details maybe some of that was happening maybe it wasn't. I find it crazy myself that if she was talking to a therapist and doctor that they wouldn't go through these steps and options with her. It's what makes me sad the most. It just seems like she was taking the steps and was being vocal about it all and showing clear signs of cries for help but she wasn't properly helped and something failed her.



I know some people are going to think "she got herself into this mess herself". I have already heard that horrible argument which doesn't touch on the real issues. I think we have all done things we regret when we were younger and some of us still do things we regret. When you are young you really don't know the roads to correct those mistakes or deal with them in the right ways. I would like to think that is what adult figures and professionals are there for. I think they failed her horribly.

 

[supraman]

I was talking to TSD about this over mumble. This generation's social media is just a problem. My generation in the teens all used AOL Instant Messenger and you never heard these stories. That guy knew where she lived because she probably never took him off her friends list and never changed her privacy settings as she profiled where she lived and went to school etc



Cyberbulling never was an issue for my generation and I'm only 28. You dont have facebook and twitter and myspace. You dont have these problems. **** you Zuckerberg!

 

[jakobeast]

I dont think its heartless to ask any of those questions Jako. I think they are the right questions to ask and have to be asked.



I have a feeling she was felt threatened to a point where going to the police etc just imposed more fear into her. That is usually the case. So yah an adult figure was def needed there to help her. Again we don't know all the details maybe some of that was happening maybe it wasn't. I find it crazy myself that if she was talking to a therapist and doctor that they wouldn't go through these steps and options with her. It's what makes me sad the most. It just seems like she was taking the steps and was being vocal about it all and showing clear signs of cries for help but she wasn't properly helped and something failed her.



I know some people are going to think "she got herself into this mess herself". I have already heard that horrible argument which doesn't touch on the real issues. I think we have all done things we regret when we were younger and some of us still do things we regret. When you are young you really don't know the roads to correct those mistakes or deal with them in the right ways. I would like to think that is what adult figures and professionals are there for. I think they failed her horribly.

Maybe that is what is bothering me. I look at the parents as, well shit, that is there job, but if she was on meds and such, then yes, she was talking to at least one psych type. At least another adult, who is trained to to see the signs of trouble anyway.



Yeah, she did get herself into this mess. So? Does that mean she should get beaten up, threatened, and harassed? People are stupid. I hate people. **** people. i hope all people get real bad heartburn when they try to sleep.

 

[the canadian dream]

lol heartburn.

 

[The Mule]

It appears that her parents weren't ignorant of what was going on. She changed schools! But yes, young people need guidance, and help. They aren't adults. They don't have the tools to deal with all the harassment.



http://www.vancouversun.com/news/Amanda+Todd+speaks+about+daughter+death/7384521/story.html



People don't go to the police because they're afraid of backlash, because they don't trust authority figures, because they're scared. How do we change that attitude? How to convince people that the police will help them and do right by them? The Vancouver police have failed women in so many ways. The Pickton mass murder case, the murdered prostitutes and other women of the Downtown Eastside. It's hard to convince people that they care, that there isn't corruption and failure.



The problem is that we want to find someone to blame, when this a systemic problem, with many factors at play. It's easy and simple to say, her parents killed her, or that boy who uploaded the topless video or some mean girl, and while they are all culpable in some way that is merely a way for us, as bystanders to feel better about it, to sweep it under the rug as all sorted. It's lazy and irresponsible. There is no one thing that would have saved her.



It's not her fault. That's like rape-shaming. She was wearing a short skirt, etc. **** that. That is never correct. It's horrible, it excuses, it's a way for people to deal with their discomfort and blame the victim. That can never stand. It's horrible. This article addresses the misogyny present in this case, and how it's a huge factor in what happened to her and how it's being written about in the media.



http://www.vancouverobserver.com/bl...misogyny-involved-amanda-todds-life-and-death



Where is empathy? People gain power from bullying. How do we take that away? I'd love to hear from the people who bullied her. What has their reaction been to this awful outcome. How do they feel? Fucking horrible I hope. And if not, then how to address that sociopathy.