The Injury Thread

[Ares]

So this evening I smashed my hookah base on my counter, it shattered, the glass cut the **** outta my left hand ring finger and I bled like a stuck pig.

Had to go to an Immediate Care and get stitched up.

Besides Urblock getting struck by lightning, who else as good injury stories.

 

[Xuder O'Clam]

I once cut my knuckle open mowing my parents' lawn. Going along the curb, back of hand right into metal edge of truck mirror.

I went to a walk in clinic also, and the doc was stoked when he saw me, and he actually said, with relish, " Hmmm ... laceration."

 

[Ares]

I once cut my knuckle open mowing my parents' lawn. Going along the curb, back of hand right into metal edge of truck mirror.

I went to a walk in clinic also, and the doc was stoked when he saw me, and he actually said, with relish, " Hmmm ... laceration."

lmao I think the doc who stitched me up was kinda into it as well...

 

[Tjodalv]

Is the story supposed to be interesting, or are we just sharing injuries?

Broken the same ankle 3 times: hockey -- some shithead jabbed my skates out from under me as I was hitting the breaks and I went into the corner boards at full speed foot first; random ill-placed step on a root; and car accident.

Hand once: same car accident -- ring finger knuckle (metacarpal to proximal phalanx) is smashed in by about 1/4 inch still.

Decent scar on the side of my bean from getting clipped by an axe: dipshit buddy decided to randomly start chopping some wood with no warning or checking to see if anyone was near him (I was roughly three feet behind, having a conversation with him) and his first backswing grazed me partially separating a good 3 inch section of scalp from skull.

But probably the only interesting one is from when one of my rib piercings got ripped out by an ex girlfriend: She was always kind of clumsy, and this one time during foreplay she managed to get her bra hooked on the lower of the pair (between ribs 8-9) and followed that with a swift motion to rear up from a prone to kneeling position. Barbell went with the bra and I ended up with two new flaps of profusely bleeding skin. Good time was had by all...

 

[Warrior Spirit]

Haha, Ares had to seek medical attention. I would have just licked the wound and went on my merry way.

I did break my toe last year when it got stuck between some rocks while going into the ocean at Sandy Hook. I didn't seek medical attention for that neither. I'm a hard man.

 

[number51]

At DeVry 1977, we went to Montrose Beach with a bunch of beers got stoned and played football. Three of us went up for a ball, landed hard and heard my arm snap. Right arm between to elbow and wrist, broke. My "friends" tell me I'm fine walk it off, my car is back in the school parking lot, so we keep playing. I'm not playing well, broken arm starts to hurt, beer, hot sun, no food, not good. We leave Montrose in 3 or 4 cars and go to our place Stormy Bulls (now the home of the Beat Kitchen https://www.google.com/maps/@41.9395673,-87.6807791,3a,75y,313.93h,90.54t/data=!3m6!1e1!3m4!1s50yqAeImcNQmkLcxVsJ5fw!2e0!7i13312!8i6656?hl=en) it was much better back then. We played some Foosball, that's what Stormy's was known for, I did not play well, and then went back to school. Finally got in my car and drove home, the arm had been broke for about 5 hours and was looking fucked up. I get home and my mom and GF are waiting for me, apparently we had something planned, they freak, arm looks fucked up. Off to Holy Family Hospital. X-Rays confirm my original diagnoses, broke fucking arm, the doc won't put a cast on because I'm drunk, he needs accurate pain level feedback. Go home sleep it off, next day miss school, get a cast, next day go back to school, my "friends" ask what happened to me. I tell them I broke my fucking arm playing football with you ******* at Montrose, remember? Nope, what are you talking about.

**** you!

 

[xer0h0ur]

The other day I was using a box cutter to try to remove some hot glued pins from signage and I foolishly had my other hand in the path of the blade when the hot glue gave out from the hard pressure cutting it. Sliced the **** out of my index finger. Probably should have got some stitches honestly but I just immediately put pressure on it after dripping some blood. It dug in a good quarter inch probably. Cleaned it with hydrogen peroxide, immobilized it with a tongue depressor type stick, bandaged it tight and kept working. Got a new scar now. Oh well. Add it to the collection.

The worst shit that ever happened to me though was when I dislocated and relocated my knee in one movement. That. Fucking. Hurt. Also happened on the first day of my vacation when we had arrived at Nuevo Vallarta. Ruined that fucking vacation real quick. I could hardly bend that knee for a while. Never got treatment for it. Fairly certain I had at least partially torn a ligament. That knee still acts up from time to time. Particularly in humid weather.

 

[winos5]

Severed the tip of my right thumb using a table saw a few years back. My 8th grade wood shop teacher is still shaking his head.... Was able to save some severed skin/tissue, hand surgeon grafted it back on.

 

[Ares]

This was me holding the wound closed while I waited for my ride to urgent care...

This is how it looks after stitches...

 

[Warden of the Northeast]

I had two fingers mangled while trying to pet a Great Dane, he went all the way to the bone. I put the flap of skin back in place, squirted some neosporin on it, bandaged it up, and went about my business...no stitches! I probably should have though.

 

[Warden of the Northeast]

Oh and then there was my boil......

 

[number51]

Oh and then there was my boil......

Is that what you call that chick that put you in the friend zone?

 

[ruprecht]

While drunk (and underaged) I fell down on a sharp root which impaled my hand through and through. That went over well with the folks.

 

[bearmick]

Got hammered drunk about 12 years ago with my buddy who lived by me. We were going into my house to drink more and for some reason I thought it would be a good idea to run over my car from the back to the front. Hopped up on the trunk, onto the roof, but it had been raining, and as I tried to run down my windshield, I slipped. Natural instinct kicked in to put my hand down to break my fall, and I did. We both lolled and then something felt weird. Looked at my right hand to find my middle finger hanging off pretty much just by the skin. Hyper-dislocation.

No business driving but he drove me to the ER where they put it back in place and put a splint on it. Woke up on my couch the next morning with a hangover from hell, then a few seconds later saw the splint on my finger and it all came back to me. Muttered some expletive and got baked. Right middle finger still doesn't straighten fully to this day.

 

[xer0h0ur]

Is that what you call that chick that put you in the friend zone?

 

[Warden of the Northeast]

Is that what you call that chick that put you in the friend zone?

No, my boil was real...didn't you read my epic thread on it? I still have a bruise mark where the boil was. After months it's slowly fading away.

 

[Globetrotter]

I cut myself pretty good a few years ago. Used some butterfly bandaids and managed to get the bleeding to stop. A few hours later I finished taking a piss and went to buckle my belt and out of nowhere I went to one knee and almost blacked out in pain. Apparently, I barely hit a tendon and it eventually snapped and went all the way into my wrist.

Didn't work for 6 months.

 

[AuCN]

I once cut my knuckle open mowing my parents' lawn. Going along the curb, back of hand right into metal edge of truck mirror.

I went to a walk in clinic also, and the doc was stoked when he saw me, and he actually said, with relish, " Hmmm ... laceration."

I am a wilderness First Responder and I just gave a safety meeting to my office on how to treat lacerations! Yay!
I dont really have anything else to contribute to this thread... oh wait... When I was 16, I was standing at the top of a halfpipe when my friend slipped out and his board shot up the ramp and smashed me in the mouth. Luckily my braces held my teeth in my mouth. I had to peel my lip off my braces though. I now have a fake tooth, a dead yellowing tooth, and a crooked smile from scar tissue.

 

[number51]

No, my boil was real...didn't you read my epic thread on it? I still have a bruise mark where the boil was. After months it's slowly fading away.

Oh I remember your boil thread, everybody remembers the epic boil thread, that would never end, and better not get necroed. I was just being a dick.

 

[number51]

I cut myself pretty good a few years ago. Used some butterfly bandaids and managed to get the bleeding to stop. A few hours later I finished taking a piss and went to buckle my belt and out of nowhere I went to one knee and almost blacked out in pain. Apparently, I barely hit a tendon and it eventually snapped and went all the way into my wrist.

Didn't work for 6 months.

That sucks, all healed up now?
Also, why are you buckling your belt after pissing? Do you sit when you piss? Unless Matt is short for Matilda, you're not supposed to do that.