Craziest sexual encounters

[SilenceS]

Have I ever told yall about my one legged midget hooker that was called "The Pitching Machine"?

 

[DC]

Awesome thread.

Like 1co, I've been in a tag-team, although not with him. Roadtripped back to college for Alumni college rugby game. It's about 2:00 A.M. at the social and girl shows up wit an azz that don't quit. My buddy and I look at one another and say "Let's do this." We both make small talk and flirt with this sophmore and eventually make an elaborate drunken plan to have them walk towards the dorms. I catch up with them, we kick his little brother out of his room, and do the nasty. About 4:00 A.M. the party is still going and she shows back up trying to make out with me. Gross. Hanging on me all morning with dick breath. But I had to hang tough so she didn't call the cops. Who knows what that crazy ***** could of said we did.

Fucked a girl in a ghetto ass laundry mat bathroom. Had sex with my now wife on her boss's desk, then floor and then spooged in her coffee mug. Her Boss was the head RA for one of the dorms in school.

I like sex.

 

[Omeletpants]

 

[JimJohnson]

Preggers?

 

[Desperado34]

If you want humorous stories of sexual encounters, I suggest you to read the Tucker Max books.

I hope They Serve Beer in Hell and Assholes Finish First. I haven't finished the second one yet.

Meh. Liked that shit in highschool,but he's such a fake hack and a dork in real life- I believe none of his bullshit. Very fratty humor. Some are funny though.

If you want a real tucker max, and one with actual good writing.


Read Charles Bukowski.

 

[Don't Care]

Met this total slut at a bar in Oak Brook, but didn't realize it because I was hanging out with my brother, and I don't mack on chicks in front of him. We exchanged numbers and I met up with her the next weekend. We went for a walk through the forest outside Argonne Lab for our first date. We were near the end of the walk, and I thought I found a safe place, so we started to make out and I lifted up her shirt and removed her bra. We then saw a bunch of kids rounding the corner; I didn't realize that there was another trail on the other side of those trees.

 

[BobEvans]

My buddy Dave & I Starred in a pornography once, The tag team. Don`t be jealous, that is just supply & Demand. We got paid a lot of money too, can u imagine. That is just life as an alpha, u can`t beat it.

 

[DC]

Awesome thread.

Like 1co, I've been in a tag-team, although not with him. Roadtripped back to college for Alumni college rugby game. It's about 2:00 A.M. at the social and girl shows up wit an azz that don't quit. My buddy and I look at one another and say "Let's do this." We both make small talk and flirt with this sophmore and eventually make an elaborate drunken plan to have them walk towards the dorms. I catch up with them, we kick his little brother out of his room, and do the nasty. About 4:00 A.M. the party is still going and she shows back up trying to make out with me. Gross. Hanging on me all morning with dick breath. But I had to hang tough so she didn't call the cops. Who knows what that crazy ***** could of said we did.

Fucked a girl in a ghetto ass laundry mat bathroom. Had sex with my now wife on her boss's desk, then floor and then spooged in her coffee mug. Her Boss was the head RA for one of the dorms in school.

I like sex.

Omg delete. Tmi.

 

[MDB111™]

Had a crazy dream about Virginia Sanhouse

 

[IBleedBearsBlood]

I once fucked my mom. I told her she moans just like my sister and she said I’m as big as my dad……. All while my aunt was shooting us on 8mm film.

 

[knoxville7]

Had a crazy dream about Virginia Sanhouse

Better than Virginia McCaskey

 

[FozzyBear]

Back in my high school if you were an athlete, home ec, among other bs electives were basically a requirement to pad the gpa.

Home ec was basically two rooms. one entrance with a secondary room that was basically the lab/kitchen. Cant remember if it was before football or baseball practice but it was after school and i took this girl in the lab and fucked her on the counter top.

Now it wasnt a crazy encounter imo, but what was funnyand crazy to me was that she was on the rag and i i raw dogged and pulled out on the counter..... so over night her bloody pussy juices and my seed dried on the counter.

The next day in home ec, without cleaning it, they rolled out cookie dough on that counter and everyone in that class ate those cookies, expect me.. i wanted to ask the teacher how mah dik tasted but i just sat there rofl and nobody understood why..

 

[wonky73]