One of my favorites:</p>
</p>
Haircuts:
<ul>[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Marines:</span> Heads will be shaved.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Army:</span> Stylish flat-top's for all recruits.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Navy:</span> No haircut standard.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Air Force:</span> Complete makeovers as seen on the Jenny Jones show.
[/list]
Training Hours:
<ul>[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Marines:</span> Reveille at 0500, train until 2000.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Army:</span> Reveille at 0600, train until 1900.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Navy:</span> Get out of bed at 0900, train until 1100, lunch until 1300, train until 1600.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Air Force:</span> Awaken at 1000, breakfast in bed, train from 1100 to 1200, lunch at 1200, train from 1300 to 1400, nap at 1400, awaken from nap at 1500, training ceases at 1500.
[/list]
Meals:
<ul>[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Marines:</span> Meals, Ready-to-Eat 3 times a day.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Army:</span> One hot meal, 2 MRE's.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Navy:</span> 3 hot meals.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Air Force:</span> Catered meals prepared by the Galloping Gourmet, Julia Child, and Wolfgang Puck and Emeril Lagasse. All you can eat.
[/list]
Leave And Liberty:
<ul>[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Marines:</span> None.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Army:</span> 4 hours a week.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Navy:</span> 2 days a week.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Air Force:</span> For every four hours of training, recruits will receive eight hours of leave and liberty.
[/list]
Protocol:
<ul>[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Marines:</span> Will address all officers as "Sir," and refer to the rank of all enlisted members when speaking to them (i.e., Sgt. Smith).
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Army:</span> Will address all officers as "Sir," unless they are friends, and will call all enlisted personnel "Sarge."
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Navy:</span> Will address all officers as "Skipper," and all enlisted personnel as "Chief."
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Air Force:</span> All Air Force personnel shall be on a first name basis with each other.
[/list]
Decorations/Awards:
<ul>[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Marines:</span> Medals and badges are awarded for acts of gallantry and bravery only.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Army:</span> Medals and badges are awarded for every bullet fired, hand grenade thrown, fitness test passed, and bed made.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Navy:</span> Will have ships' engineers make medals for them as desired.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Air Force:</span> Will be issued all medals and badges, as they will most likely be awarded them at some point early in their careers anyway.
[/list]
Camouflage Uniforms:
<ul>[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Marines:</span> Work uniform, to be worn only during training and in field situations.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Army:</span> Will wear it anytime, anywhere.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Navy:</span> Will not wear camouflage uniforms, they do not camouflage you on a ship. (Ship Captains will make every effort to attempt to explain this to sailors.)
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Air Force:</span> Will defeat the purpose of camouflage uniforms by putting blue and silver chevrons and colorful squadron patches all over them.
[/list]
Career Fields:
<ul>[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Marines:</span> All Marines shall be considered riflemen first and foremost.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Army:</span> It doesn't matter, all career fields promote to E-8 in first enlistment anyway.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Navy:</span> Nobody knows. The Navy is still trying figure out what sailors in the ABH, SMC, BNC and BSN rates do anyway.
[*]<span style="margin:0px;">Air Force:</span> Every recruit will be trained in a manner that will allow them to leave the service early to go on to higher paying civilian jobs.
[/list]