Being a fan of this team is exhausting.
They're owned by a 119 year old bag of bones, whose creepy mustachioed son is the mouthpiece for a family that still thinks they should be running the T-Formation. They're not businesspeople, nor are they really football people (despite the patriarch being the guy that started the NFL), so they have to go out and find people to find people to run the team. Meanwhile all they have to do is flash a smile, pay homage to Papa Bear, and make a joke about the Packers and you're hired.
The latest empty suit is Ryan Poles who three years ago said that we're going to take the north and never give it back. Never mind that two of his most important hires are also clients of his agent, and the third was hired because "I know Aaron Rodgers." Never mind that this former offensive lineman has only spent one premium draft pick on the offensive line. Never mind that the biggest free agency deal he's spent money on is for a guy that only plays one position despite Poles claiming he loves versatility along the line.
Never mind all of that. The fact is that every other team in the division has shown growth. The fact is that every other team in this division has an offense that pairs well with their defense. That's apparently a bridge too far for this franchise as we're just simply not allowed to have nice things.
Ryan Poles had the opportunity to turn the perception of this team around with Caleb Williams. After masterfully pulling off a trade that put you in the position to draft him. After including a legit #1 WR in that deal, signing a future HOF WR, drafting a WR in the top 10, the Bears are still no closer to a QB that can surpass 4000 yards passing and 30 TDs. Stats are just stats, sure - but when you're the only team in the NFL who hasn't achieved those two numbers despite being the oldest team in the league that says a lot about you. Apparently there's never any wind or cold in places like Seattle, Minnesota, Green Bay, Cleveland, New England, Buffalo, Philadelphia, Pittsburgh, and DC. Apparently we're the only team in the league that gets to talk about this mythical BEAR WEATHER as if we are so much more special than the other teams north of the Mason-Dixon Line. Oh, and anyone who has ever been through 3rd grade knows that Bears hibernate in the winter, which is exactly what these Bears have been doing in my lifetime with the exception of two seasons.
But don't worry guys, our head coach got a new beard and haircut. Don't worry guys, our new offensive coordinator will be sure to scheme for our offensive skill players only after they complain to the media. Don't worry guys, our "leadership council" seemingly filled with guys who have never won in the playoffs will hold each other accountable. And certainly don't worry, because they fixed the bathroom lines in that dump of a stadium on the Lake, which if they ever leave the country will never learn about deep dish pizza and Italian beefs.
This team will forever be mired in mediocrity. Learn to expect less, because you'll never be disappointed.
