Vent about your wife/GF thread

[xer0h0ur]

Ask Despo he'll tell you.

I heard he slays 10's

 

[LordKOTL]

A situation where she wanted to do something that only could be done once on a Sunday during football season has never happened. However, if it were to happen, obviously I'd make an exception. Just an example, but if someone from her family passed and the funeral was on Sunday, I would go.

But what I was venting about was her almost deliberately making plans on Sunday that could have been made another day knowing damn well that I was planning on watching football. Like the circus de soleil thing. We were both off Friday night and Saturday... but she wanted to go Sunday. And this happened three consecutive weeks. What was even more frustrating was that she didn't really offer to do anything on a Sunday in what seemed like a few months. NOW, after I gave warning that football season was coming up and I have plans on watching it with friends, she suddenly wants to do shit on Sunday that could easily be done another time? That was frustrating as ****. It's almost like she wants me to miss it so I can prove how much I like her, which, if that's true, is lame as shit.

Brett just seems to like taking things to the extreme, take things out of context, say things that weren't said, and talk nonsense in general. Oh well.

That's what I figured.

I don't necessarily think Brett meant any ill-will on it because my wife has friends who's S/O's take things like that to the far level of inflexibility--almost to the level of "How dare you schedule your childbirth on the day I watch xxx?" Sadly, there are some guys (and women, ler's be real here), that think that way and IMHO are just as wrong as the childish highschool bullshit "test" that your g/f wanted to do on you.

 

[Dogstar]

Also, for those that care about what happened... I got an apology text from her today.

I won't put the whole thing, but it basically said "I'm sorry. I feel like a ****** for bringing that shit up. You really do try hard, especially last week. I've just been moody lately."

I'll end it right there.

Feels good

Ahhhhh! That two or three days a month where some women turn into Wookalars and want to suck your brains out through your nose.

 

[RacerX]

Good god- get rid of her.

An established pastime around far longer than she has been that has always been crystal clear is absolutely your right. If she wants to insidiously creep in to that territory, then it is a microcosm of her desire to control.

Which trait of yours is next on the hit list?
I guarantee that if she wins this battle, it will snowball to the rest of your life.


My lady and I are a perfect match. Brian Urlacher was still in school when we got together.
A#1 rule to longevity is your own time and pursuits. Your individuality. She has the horses, I have the cars and bikes, all to our own. I dont visit the barn unless I need to pick up the trailer or am invited, she stays out of the garages unless I invite her in.


On the flip side, A buddy that used to wakeboard with me got married... and he allowed encroachment.She was just fine with it until the ring... now it is church on sundays and shopping on saturdays.
He may get a night every couple of months to go work on his car at his brothers house for an hour or 2... but beyond that he gets zero freedom.
Divorce proceedings are underway.

The bottom line is this- Give an inch, they will take your balls.

All a matter of priorities. My wife doesn't care ****-all about football, but she's a hell of a lot more important to me and my family then carving out a day of football-slothiness. I just record the games and watch them in the evening/night, and I can enjoy the games without stuffing my face and/or getting shit-faced (although I can relate). Problem solved.

Then again, I care far more about hockey and NCAAF then I do NFL.

 

[RacerX]

^Truer words have never been spoken.

Its fucking evil as shit that women find it necessary to take away things which are sacred to a man. I don't fucking care what it is. If it means a lot to you, she will try to take it.

twat mentality

 

[BlackHawkPaul]

All a matter of priorities. My wife doesn't care ****-all about football, but she's a hell of a lot more important to me and my family then carving out a day of football-slothiness. I just record the games and watch them in the evening/night, and I can enjoy the games without stuffing my face and/or getting shit-faced (although I can relate). Problem solved.

Then again, I care far more about hockey and NCAAF then I do NFL.

As do I.
One of our first dates was a Blackhawks game and she had never watched hockey on any medium. Now she's a fan on her own, not because she wants to spend bonding time.
I think it's healthy to have common interests and interests that are unique to your person. It's great knowing I can come home and edit films/videos while she geeks out on the PS4 or gardens. Do your own thing and meet half way.

I had an ex that literally had to be there every time I was doing something. A major pain in the ass third wheel, and I don't like doing that because it makes things uncomfortable for everyone. I can also say that I'm going out to play poker on ____. I know dudes that have to lie just to get some bro time in with their friends. The other shit is the jealousy factor. If your old lady is going out to have fun, let her have her fun. She isn't stuffing 13 cocks in her ass and if she is, maybe someone needs to assess how they choose what's dating material.

As I said earlier, we all make mistakes. Your first girlfriend most likely won't be your wife-- and shouldn't be. Trial and error should be key before you say "I do (and you really don't have to do that anymore either)."

 

[RacerX]

Yes. If the woman doesn't like football, she can go to the store and get all the goodies for the man's friends to come over and enjoy a day of football. She can make the snacks and pizzas and keep the fridge stocked with cold beer. If she truly wants to compromise with the man she loves.

#fullspartan

Or, another compromise option, wife could spend the day exercising or otherwise spend constructive time with the kids.

 

[BlackHawkPaul]

I know some friends that live to ***** about their significant others.
Shit happens in all relationships, but I don't get the dude that starts out the morning (EVERY MORNING) at the water cooler with "My ***** ass wife did _____ again." **** you. You suck. You deserve to be miserable, and I hope your wife is doing ATM with the postman and then spits the leftovers into your meat loaf when you get home tonight.
Other than that, have a nice day.

 

[FirstTimer]

In all seriousness the below books are tremendous reads. Will save relationships.

 

[BlackHawkPaul]

Mind you, if you thought everything was awesome and you come home to a Dear John letter, that's different.

 

[FirstTimer]

I know some friends that live to ***** about their significant others.
Shit happens in all relationships, but I don't get the dude that starts out the morning (EVERY MORNING) at the water cooler with "My ***** ass wife did _____ again." **** you. You suck. You deserve to be miserable, and I hope your wife is doing ATM with the postman and then spits the leftovers into your meat loaf when you get home tonight.
Other than that, have a nice day.

This. That's why in these type of discussions I never really judge the guy or wife for venting. Two sides to every story.

Nice to see brett still be a judgmental asshole as well.

 

[BlackHawkPaul]

In all seriousness the below books are tremendous reads. Will save relationships.

If you're reading this as a side project-- I get it. Cool. I'd like to read both just to see if the authors are full of shit.
If you're reading these as a way to mend a relationship, stop. Get out. If you're in couples counseling, stop. Get out. Sometimes shit doesn't work and people aren't compatible. Find someone that works for and with you. If you can't find that person, look at what you want in a significant other and check what your standards are and what you want. Perhaps they may be unrealistic. I have buddies that are dense as hell because they think they can land 10s when they're 3s and asking mom for the meat loaf.
Again, I'm not judging and I could be completely full of shit, but you and your significant other meeting with a stranger/counselor (who fucking knows what their personal life is like) giving the both of you life advice seems dangerous and futile.
It's more than a two way street. More like a highway system in Dallas.

 

[FirstTimer]

If you're reading this as a side project-- I get it. Cool. I'd like to read both just to see if the authors are full of shit.
If you're reading these as a way to mend a relationship, stop. Get out. If you're in couples counseling, stop. Get out. Sometimes shit doesn't work and people aren't compatible. Find someone that works for and with you. If you can't find that person, look at what you want in a significant other and check what your standards are and what you want. Perhaps they may be unrealistic. I have buddies that are dense as hell because they think they can land 10s when they're 3s and asking mom for the meat loaf.
Again, I'm not judging and I could be completely full of shit, but you and your significant other meeting with a stranger/counselor (who fucking knows what their personal life is like) giving the both of you life advice seems dangerous and futile.
It's more than a two way street. More like a highway system in Dallas.

You are.

FWIW, I have close friends who are marriages counselors and based on your comments here I'm not sure you really understand what goes on in those sessions.

I've personally seen counseling and reading save relationships.

I've read both and IMO both authors are pretty much spot on. Can't really disagree with anything they said.

 

[BlackHawkPaul]

You are.

FWIW, I have close friends who are marriages counselors and based on your comments here I'm not sure you really understand what goes on in those sessions.

I've personally seen counseling and reading save relationships.

I've read both and IMO both authors are pretty much spot on. Can't really disagree with anything they said.

Fair enough.

 

[Urblock]

Jesus guys. My wife is my best friend. Maybe I'm just lucky.

 

[BlackHawkPaul]

Jesus guys. My wife is my best friend. Maybe I'm just lucky.

Apparently I am too.

 

[FirstTimer]

Jesus guys. My wife is my best friend. Maybe I'm just lucky.

Apparently I am too.

Not to dive too much into this but that's why many times marriage issues suck is because your best friend is hurting your feelings and either doesn't understand it or doesn't even know it. Many times raw emotions and fixing things that invariably come up in a marriage don't make for a good mix.

Sometimes it helps to have an impartial party view that and help take a look at that stuff.

If you can get through it without that help, awesome. But to make a statement like this: "If you're in couples counseling, stop. Get out.......but you and your significant other meeting with a stranger/counselor (who fucking knows what their personal life is like) giving the both of you life advice seems dangerous and futile." screams of not understanding the situations and not understanding the purpose behind what I would wager to say is 90% of marriage counseling.

 

[winos5]

[video=youtube;N7JxlX6tbeg]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N7JxlX6tbeg[/video]

 

[BlackHawkPaul]

Not to dive too much into this but that's why many times marriage issues suck is because your best friend is hurting your feelings and either doesn't understand it or doesn't even know it. Many times raw emotions and fixing things that invariably come up in a marriage don't make for a good mix.

Sometimes it helps to have an impartial party view that and help take a look at that stuff.

If you can get through it without that help, awesome. But to make a statement like this: "If you're in couples counseling, stop. Get out.......but you and your significant other meeting with a stranger/counselor (who fucking knows what their personal life is like) giving the both of you life advice seems dangerous and futile." screams of not understand the situations and not understanding the purpose behind what I would wager to say is 90% of marriage counseling.

I tend to blow up the Enterprise a la Star Trek III.
As I said before, fair point.

 

[BlackHawkPaul]

I think the counseling profession is happy that the rate of failures for relationships is near the 60% mark.
It has to be one of the few industries not affected by economic swings (in certain cases).